So eight months ago, I quit my full time job as a fledgling art director to become an intern at Mainsocial, to pursue a more solid skill set consisting of web design and UX. It had been a heavy decision, for sure, but I’m quite glad to say that I feel like I’ve made the right choice.

I know it’s always tough to weigh such options, going between the comfort of full-time employment and the thrill of starting afresh. However, in the span of less than a year (part-time, at that), I’ve been able to gather an insane amount of knowledge. No, really, it’s almost stupid how much I know now, compared to a year ago. I’m not being a dick. If anything, I’m just realizing how far into the Dark Ages I’ve been living in.

And I don’t mean that in the trite “forever amateur” sort of philosophical way, but I mean tangible knowledge that I’ve been able to use and apply in real professional situations. Never in my little life did I even think I was capable of building websites and creating experiences as I’ve done in the past few months. The only working knowledge I had of PHP was how to include headers and footers.

Last week, I actually learned and helped extend WordPress into a fully functional archiving system for a +25-year-old art gallery. WTF?! I don’t clench my butt cheeks when I go into a functions.php file anymore—because the shit makes sense now! Well, parts of it. Hey, it’s better than the panic attacks I used to get when I couldn’t get my goddamn divs to align.

The part that is refreshing to me is the optimism I feel about where I’m headed. While it is certainly work and everyone has business goals, I feel a real sense of community in this little pocket of the profession. Collaborations are warm and information is free, as long as you pull your own weight. I don’t feel an urgent sense of competition or in the past, even subterfuge, because really, everyone just wants their fucking code to work. And I really, really like that.

I don’t think I’ve ever been one of those people who are in love with design—particularly print design. I’ve said it before, but my heart doesn’t skip a beat in the presence of foil-stamped covers or perfectly aligned grids. I don’t talk about design as if it were my lover, or my work as if it were the only thing that keeps me alive. Yea, that shit’s pretty. But so is a roast turkey during the holidays.

Perhaps in the past I’ve tried to become enamoured by point sizes and dots-per-inches, but the sentiment always fell a little flat, a little empty. The thing is, I have made plenty of friends who know much more than I do, and essentially, their love for the craft is enough for me to live on. I didn’t want to compete with that level of appreciation, mostly because I couldn’t.

Basically, I think my point is that design to me is more like my homeboy, rather than an ardent soulmate who completes me. I like hanging out with it, but I don’t want to marry it. Design can ride off into the sunset with Tom Cruise, for all I care. As long as it writes once in a while.

I’m realizing that I have my own interests, and as most people who come of age might understand, it’s alright to be a little different. I like how it’s perfectly normal to nerd out about new apps and tools. My obsessive nature towards researching is getting put to good use, and that’s when it stops feeling like a job. Sometimes I still work late into the wee hours, but because what’s involved naturally interests me, I am compelled to keep going. I watch lots of YouTube cat videos in between sessions.

In short, I think I’m happy where I am currently. Things might change, and it may be a little soon to say, but I’m making it a point to document this state and feeling, so that I may be able to look back on what I’ve accomplished and see where it all began.

Share